Monday, May 15, 2006

MTV's Super Sweet 16 Turns Republicans Into Democrats

A historic moment happened this weekend during MTV's My Super Sweet 16 marathon. Ape Culture's conservative curmudgeonly correspondent, Art Haarper, who has not voted for a Democrat since the party nominated McGovern, watched a single episode and had an epiphany. Art, who receives Christmas cards from the Bushes and Ashcrofts in gratitude for his party contributions, could not believe that a California teen named Natalie was haranguing her parents into spending $200,000 on her Sweet 16 party. He watched in horror as Natalie purchased a $900 dress, got an $800 pedicure complete with diamonds on her toes, threw numerous hissy fits, and kicked freshman out of her soiree. At the conclusion of the show, an agitated Art insisted I change the channel. He declared, "That show is enough to turn me into a Democrat!" Yes, the show's espousal of conspicuous consumption was just too much for Art. He recognized parallels between the bacchanalia depicted on this show and the Roman Empire before the fall. Hilary, you just may have a new campaign volunteer.

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