American Idol - Philly Cheese

Yay, American Idol is back! The 7th Season kicked off with auditions in Philadelphia. 29 souls made it to Hollywood but we were only introduced to 10.

The Good

• Joey Catalano - He recently lost 200 lbs and crooned a Maroon 5 tune. Kinda geeky looking, but good energy and human interest story.
• Melanie Nyema - She was a backup singer for Taylor Hicks and had a likable vibe.
• Junot Joyner - Junot delivered a soulful version of "I Guess That's Why They Call It the Blues"
  
• Jore Candelaria - He had a boy band quality and sang "Unbreak My Heart" en espanol.
• Jonathan Baines - He was cute - definitely Paula's type.
• Angela Martin - Angela is a wedding singer from Chicago with a big, supportive family and a daughter who has Rett's Syndrome. She's very pretty and sweet, with a Lifetime-movie-ready story, but I wonder if her voice is strong enough to carry her beyond Hollywood.
• Kristy Lee Cook - She's a country gal from Oregon who trains horses and lives in a log cabin - yet she's training to be a cage fighter. Grrr!
  
• Beth Stalker - She's already recorded an album of gospel songs as a 4-year-old "Little Liz" - can she recapture that magic?
• Chris Watson - Chris has model looks and a very smooth voice - should do well - but then, we thought the same about Jenry Bejarno last year, didn't we?
• Brooke White - She's a nanny who's never seen an R-rated movie. If we didn't get our fill of the "gosh golly" from Melinda last year, Brooke may go far.
  

The Bad and The Ugly

• Alaa Youakeem - "Call me Yuka," he said. "I want to love a girl from the hair to the nipple." Gap-toothed Yuka was Borat-tific.
  
• James Lewis - A tour guide in a mustard-colored suit sang "Go Down Moses". How low could he go? Quite low.
  
• Temptress Brown - A plus-sized high school linebacker (I was as skeptical about this as Ryan - offensive lineman maybe - and then I was shocked that Ryan knew what a linebacker did), Temptress tugged at our heartstrings by declaring she was trying out for her morbidly obese, wheelchair-bound mom. She was a sweetie and after failing got a group hug and even some kindness from Simon, who admitted to liking kittens.
  
• Alexis Cohen - AKA "Glitter Girl" - Alexis was a dynamo, who Simon thought resembled Willem Dafoe. She lives in a studio apartment with her mom and several pets, and they were quite the Grey Gardens duo. Rejected after imitating Grace Slick, she cursed Simon out and declared she would take up "actressing." Look out, Hollywood!
• Milo Turk - He was a 39-year-old social worker with a message for teens that he delivered in his song "No Sex Allowed." I mean, really, is anyone pressuring Milo to have sex?? Besides wasn't this message already delivered by Jermaine Stewart in "We Don't Have to Take Our Clothes Off"?
  
• Paul Marturano - Paul delivered a song about stalking Paula that actually had some clever lyrics ("If you were a blackboard, I would chalk it...if you were a bathtub, I would caulk it"), but his intense performance freaked out the judges.
• Ben Haar - Portly Ben entered the judging room with a cloak, then revealed he was wearing Princess Leia's gold bikini. His chest hair disturbed Paula, so he was sent for a waxing.
• Christina Tolisano - Who would have thought we'd see two Princess Leias in one night? Christina was the donut-haired varietal, and she didn't make it and threw a hissy fit in the name of dork pride.